Am I Being Used?

Q: I’ve been involved with a man for a few months and I recently noticed that he’s pulling away from me. One night he called me and acted strangely so I asked why he was calling. He said it was just a “booty call.” I’m not sure what he meant by this, but by his tone, I knew I’d been demoted from. What did he mean by this?

A: You’re right, a “booty call” is not a good thing. This derogatory term refers to the act of calling someone solely fro soliciting sex. That’s it. It’s a call that usually comes in late at night, as an after thought. Basically your role in that kind of “relationship” is to be their sexual outlet.

It sounds like it’s time to move on. Once someone becomes nothing more in their partner’s life than a means for sexual release, all hope of resurrecting the relationship is over. As you well know, that is an insulting place to be.

Your partner has put you in a temporary holding place until he finds a replacement for you. Once he does, he’ll stop calling altogether. Save yourself the unnecessary anguish and end it before you get hurt any more. The next time he calls asking for a “bootie call, “ tell him your booty is looking for someone new and no longer available to him.

by Nancy Fagan, M.S.


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