good listener takes more than being attentive to your partner when he
or she talks with you. Instead, the key to strong communication is
knowing the characteristics of a poor listener.
The act of
NOT listening is not exclusively a fault of men; women do it just as
often. Below is a list of common blocks to effective listening:
of being right and your partner being wrong.
Insecurity about topics that creates defensiveness.
resenting your pattern.
or verbally criticizing what your partner is saying.
preoccupied with other issues.
impatient or not in the mood to talk.
Rehearsing what you will say while your partner is talking.
to hasty conclusions.
Dismissing what you hear.
ahead of what your partner is saying.
build up of strong emotions during a discussion.
dislike for the subject.
The key to
effective communication is identifying when you are doing any of the
roadblocks above and work to change it. Like all change, it requires
practice, but it's possible as long as you are willing to make the